Acupuncture With A Side of Fried Chicken

I don’t eat fried chicken but I work at a place for fried chicken. The food will always be “Good.” “Amazing.” I say “You’ll love it” to people. Because they will love it. I tried the fried chicken once and it was amazing, and then I had diarrhea and migraines for days. I had to get to acupuncture pronto to help my gut. That, ginger root, and exercise helped it get totally better. And I will still sell both of those things to people touting their goodness for the right reasons.

Granted bar food is so easy to sell. “You’re here for the delicious bar food, right? Do you like grease? Spice? Drinks and beer cheese fries? Doing something totally indulgent? Sweet. Welcome and let me help you get you set up.”

I want to make selling acupuncture this easy. People walking into my clinic knowing what they wanna get, looking forward to the final product, and money is already on the table.

~ ~ ~

 

Since March I took this job at Crisp Restaurant + Bar in Shaw neighborhood of DC, a fast-changing part of D.C., with a lot of cute neighborhood digs.

The restaurant, on 1st and Rhode Island, best known for their hot chicken, a fried specialty, and classic southern-cooked sides such as mac n cheese (super cheesy), collard greens, french fries, banana pudding, and the famous craft cocktail like an Old Fashioned…

Though this chicken joint is ‘not me’ – it IS me.

As an acupuncturist I have been thinking the thoughts of WHO AM I if I eat gluten, or love cheesy mac n cheese, drink soda when I eat out, or have a few bottomless mimosas too many like these other customers are doing.

Where others drop their money on a six pack or some fried chicken, I will drop any amount of money on the right dairy-free milk, the right sugar-free kimchi, or the right gluten-free granola. Definitely I am a bit of a holistic fanatic.  If it’s natural and botanical, spiritual or transformational, high vibrating, food, supplements, or access to higher knowledge, I will pay top dollar. For example I will spend the extra $4 on a juice with juiced parsley in it because I know parsley helps eliminate mercury and free radical levels from the system.

Of course being well versed in the realms of healing, using holistic methods of healing (acupuncture, nutrition, rest, water, breathing exercises, chakra meditations, natural herbs or supplements, journaling, yoga what have you) is my job and I should invest in these things. It’s good to have high health standards so I can teach my patients. I coach people to solve their health concerns sustainably and holistically, helping to move their chi based on how cultivated I am in the cultivation and movement of my own chi.

I had a lot of fears going into a new service job (never mind that I had worked on a coffee bus on Hawaii). What would people think of me as a healer/health conscious person? Would I look less like an acupuncturist? Would I get ostracized or bullied by people at work for being ‘too holistic’? Would I fall back into some old habits (drinking, smoking, not sleeping enough, not exercising enough, whatever) that would negatively impact or compromise my health in some way? Would I pick up some bad friendships or bad vibes dealing with people or would I get along with everyone? And the bigger question for my career, how would I be in bigger and bigger environments around more and more people and still maintain healing presence and a sense of vitality to be able to heal? I ask these questions for myself and for many other practitioners of healing arts or who feel a calling to take holistic measures in their lives but also have to be out in the world interacting with many different businesses, working otherwise for yourself and paying all the bills.

I have been able to make this experience work for me despite my past experiences in bars, in the nightlife lifestyle, which is bringing up past times I was bullied (really!) for having food intolerances or wanting to go to bed early, dealing with bad vibes, and getting myself into trouble. I had shut myself off and distanced myself a lot from what represented to me these oppositional forces. I’ve adopted that I just need to be in the moment with my experience. (Isn’t that always the answer?)

I can now love and accept the irony here. Doing something I want to do that is the opposite of what people expect is part of a soul expansion I am doing- something my soul needs to explore and learn from and grow from for reasons that are mysterious. (This is in fact the hallmark sign of soul work).

 

And I’ll close with a story that I feel is related, learning not to take yourself too seriously making life out to be so linear or absolute…that healing is neither linear or absolute:

In the car on the way home from a retreat with my acupuncture class, I told a friend a bit too preemptively, and a bit too boldly (I was a little grumpy at the time) that she, a recovering alcoholic going to meeting Alcoholics Anonymous, would one day find herself  years from now able to have a drink without calling herself or labeling herself an alcoholic, or feeling the pain or guilt at any trajectory of relapse. I was being a bit of a devil’s advocate.

Of course she got really mad at me because AA was her life, her support, and her community at that point in her recovery. Duh, it was upsetting to her when so much of her life and her transition was tied to this 12-Step program (which is really an amazing resource for people struggling with addictions). I felt bad after I said it, it was not my place to say, and even in my grumpy state, it was coming from a good intention. At the time I had just finished reading Eckhart Tolle’s ‘The Power of Now’ and he made this exact point about an alcoholic in recovery.

I know it sounds kinda mean and maybe crazy, especially to people who have struggled with addiction (which, if we lived in our 20s, we all probably have). Definitely we can all agree any addiction is a brain disease (an escape, seeking comfort from the outside, seeking to change your state to avoid old unidentified patterns of pain) that takes a lot of time to heal, undoing karma with people interpersonally and reworking the structure of your life.

I wanted to leave with this above idea anyway, that there will come a day when we don’t need to identify with what we’ve been handed and the wounds we were meant to bear, the labels we have had to carry – we need the story and we need to move beyond the story. Ultimately.

And that would be freeing. Imagine how liberating that would be, if we aren’t these realities, we have already overcome what we ‘thought’ we were without even trying.  We realize we didn’t need those things to be sane anyway, everything is wrote, and we can trust ourselves exactly for who we are for now anyway.

How often do we take for granted how much we have changed that would make an outcome totally different if we truly saw ourselves for who we are Today?

It’s important to continuously let go of the past, identifying with it, letting it define who we are. We can’t let just anything in our life DEFINE us. These things of ‘WHO AM I’ of where I eat, where I work, what I do, who I connect with are not ME – IDENTIFIED. Doing that will limit where our soul needs to experience everything.

I was moved that what I felt was called for was to be a server, and I smile to myself when I think of the term ‘server.’ It’s about being humble and getting your work done and being there for people.

I decided I would trust this idea that kept repeatedly entering my mind (even before my friend who owns the place offered that I come in). I realized I like the service industry a lot. I like the people I interact with. I like the community and the camaraderie and doing business with people. The people I work with at Crisp feel like family, and each of us has our important role which feels very grounding.

I want to sell acupuncture and create community and family. I want to make holistic healthcare as accessible and wonderful as rich greasy food is to the American diet. I am learning about creating the consistency and proper nourishment for everyday people and how to serve up exactly what they want every day. Like a cold beer that could actually be good for you. 🙂

#LifeInHonolulu – A Déjà Vu That Is Forever

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Today marks Day 2 of #LifeInHonolulu – in starting my life, starting my life over, whatever you wanna call it, it’s starting to feel like all the same thing.

My astrologer back in April said that Saturn had moved into the first house of my chart (marked by my trip to coastal California mid-October last year) – auguring a pretty literal birth of my body, mind, and spirit. It’s a rare astrological reset that showed up in my chart.

He said everything needed to be reinvented. New hair, new body, new business card, new location, new brand, new everything.

So here I am, taking the advice and moving into my astrological coordinates. That is to say, in the cartographic location of my Moon’s north node. (Everyone has a North and South node in their astrological chart – the South node contains the themes of our past life experiences; the North node indicates themes we need to realize or promote in this lifetime.)

Having moved to Honolulu three days ago, I am still working with quite a bit of fear and anxiety which I have been mitigating through action: doing online research, reaching out to contacts, making time for lots of prayer, visualization, taking proper rest and food.

(Digressing just a little, the food here is amazing. Those half-an-hour trips I was taking to to go to H-Mart, the nearest Asian market in DC, are now a thing of the past. All the Asian goods I love are in every aisle in all the grocery stores here pretty much. A Chinese nutritional heaven!!)

Things I have to do are: buy a car, find a job, find a place to live, and I have to do it mostly on my own. I’ve done this once before in another country…I just need to keep reminding myself that I am wiser, stronger, and more dynamic than all the fears my mind is constantly recapitulating. What helps is to remind myself of all the gifts I have to give and all the ways I can serve people instead of feeling bogged down by the minutiae.

This morning… I opened my eyes at 6:30am. I woke up from a dream where I found soggy wads of money on the ground…

As I lay there in the dawn, various waves of feeling came over me, on a Soul level. This island of Oahu resonates with me on a level I can only barely explain here.

Driving away from the airport in the rental car shuttle as I was first taking in the views, I felt like I had been here before. It felt like I was coming into an alternate hometown of Washington, DC, the same home in a land somewhere else (to my mother’s dismay I’m sure). My first cousin Jennifer who lives here with her husband explained to me that this feeling was “the island welcoming me.”

Chinese medicine states that from the hours of 3am-7am of the Lung and Large Intestine officials in the element of Metal augment a thinner veil between the physical and the spiritual. Therefore spiritual guidance, strong intuitions, inner wisdom, dreams or grief we need to process, or stark spiritual encounters become more apparent at this time.

I wrote in my journal this morning:

I’ve been dreaming a lot. All the details of finding a place and living here feel overwhelming right now.

Yet it feels also surreal, like all these dreams I forgot I dreamed are resurfacing

Like a déjà vu that lasts for hours.

Dreams already dreamed, lives already lived.

I’ve already been here and dreamed in a life here. It feels like I’m walking into a layers of my existence.

It’s like watching a kid’s cartoon from your childhood and feeling everything you felt as a child when you first watched it flood back to you again.

Except it’s ongoing, and all these other things, being recalled.

Seeing your soul’s growth in slow motion and real time.

I’m experiencing a part of myself that is happening now and in the future and in the past,

and on and on.”

 

I’ll no doubt keep you in this loop as to what comes of this mysterious island in the Pacific Ocean – at this lunar coordinate of my life – so in the stars, so in the sea, finding my cove on the rock.

Check back again soon!! <3

Why I’m Moving To Hawai’i

Today marks my last week on the mainland of the U.S. of A. September 6th I’m going on a one-way trip to Hawaii for an undetermined amount of time.

The reasons why I am going are very simple in my mind and in my heart. I’m ready for a new experience, I’m ready to not live in the D.C. area, and I’m ready to take my career to another level in an ocean close to Asia.

Other reasons are I’m ready to live by the ocean, I’m ready to feel confident in my body, and I’m ready to meet a new soul tribe who take their healing work very seriously.

A tertiary reason? I’m ready to get the f out of my parents house! Hah. California is out of the question right now and I’m totally bored with the East Coast.

As things have turned out in D.C., I’ve become estranged from most all of the people I considered close because I just grew out of the ways we were interacting. I’m not your typical Washingtonian. I don’t drink anymore. My ‘healing stuff’ isn’t received as interesting or relevant to most people and conversations often fall silent if they come up at all, something I find very personally frustrating.

I am stifled by the inertia of my past and broke from my acupuncture grad degree without the network or infrastructure of support like many high-level graduates, just a small mortgage to pay off and a lot of needed reform. Everything needs to change, on a micro level in my life so that I may serve, and on a macro scale for all of humanity in making acupuncture the commodity it deserves to be.

Because of all these things I can see, I can’t be the “Old Lindsay” anymore. I can’t even be Lindsay anymore. In fact, it feels more apt for me to change my name completely so people can get used to calling me, and relating to me, in a new way.  It just doesn’t feel like I’m the same person… really at all.

It’s been interesting ending this period of my life in DC noticing the illusions I kept, the people who have chosen to stay, the people who have chosen to leave, and the people I’ve asked to leave…

A funny thing I’ve encountered in this are people who outright offend or passive aggressively avoid me to better distance themselves. I hate drama, and try to avoid it when I can, but sometimes it’s inevitable, and that’s the way a lot of people cope with grief, resentment, or repressed anger. People are giving me shit just to give me shit. Just because I’m leaving…I get it. No hard feelings…It’s human nature (and probably all of us have abandonment issues of one kind or another).

Just let me go in peace. To use a metaphor by Elizabeth Gilbert, I’m the crab, crawling out of the bucket.

In fact, Now is the time of year to be letting go of a lot. Relationships that suck, people that suck, activities that suck, clutter and crap in our space, on our desks, in our computer, in our minds, all the stuff that just doesn’t matter anymore.

(I definitely recommend Marie Kando’s ‘The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” because it helps to really see the trees from the forest in terms of what we actually need in our life. I started it in the spring and now am reading the last chapters for the penultimate purge.)

Can you feel it in the air? This end of summer? The change in light, in temperature, in mood? The best way to cope to what can be quite a difficult time for people is to LET GO and lighten the load of this year’s cycle, now in its harvest season.

Just like the peaches and melons and squashes getting large and hanging low on their vine, we too are heavy, full, and almost rotting at the fullness of the year and all that has come to fruition in our lives.

We must slow down in order to be able to digest, in order to savor, and be thoughtful about our hard work and what it has served.  And toss it out – the rotted parts at least so we can make a feast of the rest.

So as I savor what this summer has been, as weird and ‘off’ as it has felt in some regards, a stranger in the most familiar land of my home, I feel more ready than ever to leave for a new place. A place near Asia, near the ocean, where I can practice acupuncture with peace in nature. I’m switching it up.

Make Your Move:

If you’re jealous or feeling some other version of this emotion around my decision, don’t be!

Anything is possible.

Don’t leave yourself out of the good stuff in life.

Discern what is valuable, make a plan, and go on a trip.

Make a list of one-month goals, three-month goals, six-month goals, on up to five-year goals and use it as soul-fuel for your ideal lifestyle. This is a totally internal and self-exploratory process and it ignites itself when you are ready for it.

If you’re in a period in your life where you feel it’s time to let go of people, or change your career, or change your lifestyle or where you live, TRUST THOSE FEELINGS and do it for the thrill of the change and for the beauty and value of what you would learn! They are important markers you must not ignore.

Follow the way of the Tao. Don’t fight yourself, don’t resist yourself.

Get the nuts and bolts and structure in place (logistics, money, time) and then let the Universe take up the rest, lead you where you’re supposed to be.

I’m 30, I have no children and no husband. I’ve been living at home with my parents for a year with no regrets. I’ve been in therapy, I’ve excavated my dark night of the soul for every minute I was to endure it, going through the broke, broken, torn, isolated, and hungry parts of myself.

I’ve been wandering and waiting for “my time” for quite some time. I’ve been through a lot, searching for something real, and lasting, and worth living for.

The dawn is blue.  I’m waiting for my bus with my two suitcases and I’m headed for the ocean.

You can do exactly what I’m doing. Don’t be afraid of your inner voice. You will never be led astray. As my friend Jessica Sandhu said, “I’ve never regretted any investment I’ve made for myself.”

This wasn’t random or an accident. I’ve dreamed about Hawai’i since I was in fourth grade. This was tapping into Life à la carte and coming up with the menu myself.

Dream on, let yourself be, let yourself be guided, and of course, like always, I’ll see you on the other side. 🙂

The Human Aura

We are surrounded by a powerful flow of energy which contain different consciousnesses and thought forms from ourselves, the people around us, and the environment. The collection is like a work of art! Dance is a great therapy, as is art for the flow it provides from these auras, energies, and chakra centers. Other forms are exercise, showering, and move-going.
 
These flows protect and regulate with the feelings and emotions we emit from our heart center, which is pertinent to our particular growth and a powerful magnetic force.
 

Outside influences that are attracted/reflected there are part of the seeing, feeling, moving embodiment of this regulating cycling energy around us.

 

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Here is a picture of people getting their aura taken by photograph. Though I have never had this done myself or necessary prescribe myself to this, I do think it portrays a nice flicker of what you might see sometime randomly on someone as I started to when I started healing myself and tending to myself. I must say, the accentuation of these things was a very positive side effect of all-natural medicine!

I love learning about people’s particular noticings. What are yours? How do you listen and pay attention to energy? How do you look and observe someone and know what they’re feeling?

Lm